Home is Where the Heart is
by nighinvisible
Summary: To learn to think strategically, Sakura enlists Konoha's number one lazy bastard to teach her Shogi. After weeks of lessons, Sakura learns more than the game than she ever knew and discovers new feelings she didn't know she had.lemons,anime spoilers.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: All it took was a couple of (ahem) less than pleasant PM's to let me know that I have taken entirely too long to begin a new fanfiction. Further, they let me know that starting back with an OC fic was unacceptable. So I withdraw my OC fic (you don't know what you are missing out on!) and am going to use a few of my ideas from that for this lovely tale. So no more bitching, ok? Also, for all of my male fans, this is my first hetero fic! No boy love, I promise. Also, there are going to be spoilers in here. Just a heads up.

- - - - -

The kunai was pressed into her neck hard enough that she could feel the tell-tale trickle of blood. It was over, and her inner voice was kicking her self all over. She tapped her leg and felt the arms wrapped around her neck release. Instinctively, Sakura's hand rushed up to put pressure on the minor wound her teammate, Kakashi, had just given her.

"KAKA-SENSEI!! HOW DARE YOU HURT SAKURA-CHAAAAAAAAN!!!" Even though Kakashi was just the third member of their team, neither Naruto nor Sakura had been able to give up the "sensei" honorific.

In an orange flash, Naruto was beside Sakura, arm around her shoulders, face ridiculously twisted in concern.

"Are you alright, Sakura-chan? Does it hurt?" When peering closer he saw blood on her fingertips and his face shifted from concern to terror. He gripped her shoulders and shook her, screaming, "SAKURA-CHAAAAN! DON'T DIE!!! I'LL RUN FOR TSUNADE, JUST HOLD ON!"

Naruto was so involved in his own dramatics he missed Sakura's fist raise slowly above his head, only to come swiftly crashing into his skull.

"_BAKA_, it is just a cut. I'm not a delicate flower, you know!"

Naruto sat on the ground holding his injured head, watching with hurt and interest as Sakura used a small bit of her chakra to seal the cut. In seconds, no one could have known she had ever been on the losing side of an attack.

"OWIIIEE, I was just concerned for my teammate, you didn't have to hit so hard!!"

_Hmph_. Naruto was actually lucky she was almost completely drained of her chakra, or her hit would have been much harder. During training she always left herself just enough chakra to heal her scrapes and bruises so her flawless skin could remain, well, flawless. Still, she probably was a little hard on him. It was just that she was damned frustrated.

How did Kakashi beat her so badly_ again_?

Kakashi had been training them individually for weeks. Because she and Naruto had been able to grab the bells from him as a team years ago, he wanted them to hone their individual skills. It wasn't that she expected to beat her former sensei, the infamous copy-ninja. It was just that she didn't expect to be beaten so badly every time. Naruto didn't win, but he could at least make Kakashi work for the victory. Whenever she sparred with him, he never even needed to take off his eye patch. It felt like her extensive training with Tsunade-sama had been for nothing.

"Yo, practice is over. Go home and reflect on today." Kakashi began to pack up the supplied he had brought to training today.

"Sakura-chan, would you like to go on a date? I'll even pay!" Naruto jingled his frog-shaped coin purse. It sounded a little empty. "Or…"

"Thanks, but no thanks, Naruto. I'm beat. Can I take a rain check? Perhaps when you can actually afford to take me out?"

Naruto agreed easily so long as there was a promise for a next time. He sprinted off to town, his mouth already salivating at the thought of ramen. Sakura started more slowly, contemplating the day's exercises. Things didn't add up in her mind, though. Quickly, she turned back and found Kakashi, who was apparently going at another round of training solo. The thought that he still had enough energy to do so after fighting her further infuriated her. How could she be so awful after so much hard work?

She watched her former sensei, amazed at his grace and skill. He moved like fluid, like nothing could touch him, but his offense was obviously deadly. She had seen him fight before but it never failed to take her breath away. She remembered another man whose fighting style had taken her breath away. They had found him again, he had been right there, so close she touched him…

_Sasuke_. Of course, the touches had been more like punches, and while she was impressed that she had actually been able to stand up to him, the encounter had re-lit her heart. After the three years of his absence, she had almost convinced herself she felt only friendship for the Uchiha heir. But seeing him there…Even thinking about it now made her stomach queasy, her heart light and fluttery. God, it had been four years since then, she was now twenty and yet there was still that residual passion for a boy who was _still_ gone, was _still_ vengeful. While she regretted that she and Naruto had not found Itachi yet, she also was glad—she knew Sasuke hadn't, either.

"Maaah, Sakura? It is a little weird to have you staring at me with that look on your face." Kakashi's visible eye was scrunched in embarrassment.

Her face flushed red and she waved her hands furiously in front of her—"No No! It isn't like that, I was…I was thinking about something else!"

The visible eye relaxed and stared at her knowingly. "Do you mean some_one_ else?"

_He knows me too well_. "Hai, I was thinking about him."

Kakashi waited for more, but Sakura made no move to continue. What could she say, really? That Kakashi's sharigan was a constant reminder of her former teammate, or that each day she wondered where Sasuke was, and what he was thinking about? _Does he think about me even half as much as I think about him_? No, none of that was something that she could talk to Kakashi, or anyone, about.

"Uh…you are doing the staring thing again."

She didn't turn as red the second time.

"Surely you didn't come back here to talk to me about Sasuke, Sakura?"

She winced—hearing the boy genius' name out loud was still painful for her. It reminded her of how very gone he was, and had been. He's been gone seven years… that was almost as long as she had known him.

"No, I didn't come to talk about him. I came to talk about…me."

Kakashi's eyebrow rose up in amusement. "Oh?"

"I've been training so long now, and I am still pathetic fighting alone! I do so well in groups but alone I am completely useless."

Kakashi walked over to her and laid a hand on her shoulder. She realized how much she had grown, because this close she could see the arteries in his neck. Medical training automatically taught her eyes to find the major life points.

"You have gotten significantly stronger, Sakura. And no one can deny your incredible medical skills, particularly when you are so young. However, what was it that you were first so good at, before the strength and the medical training?"

The pink haired chuunin scrunched her face, thinking. "Ummmm…"

"Shogi."

This caught her off guard.

"What do you mean, 'Shogi!'?"

"I mean that you were a good ninja originally because you were smart. You've been so good at your new skills that you haven't needed to think. When you are in teams, you rely on others to think. The only time you use your intelligence now is for quick medical dilemmas. So go play Shogi. Learn to put some thought into battle, and you will be closer."

"Closer to what?"

"Beating me, of course!"

"KAKA-SENSEI—" She raised a glowing hand and slammed it into Kakashi's face. She heard a poof and she watched as a log of wood slammed into another tree, knocking it over.

_Replacement technique_. What a jerk.

And what kind of advice was 'Shogi', anyway!?

- - - - -

Sakura wandered into the Ramen shop. No surprise, Naruto sat there, surrounded by bowls. To her pleasant surprise their teacher from many years ago, Iruka, was there as well and laughing lightly with his former pupil.

"Hello!" She pulled up a chair beside Iruka.

"SAKURA-CHAAAAAN! I thought you were going home!"

"Oh? So you don't want me here? Fine, Naruto…but I had really been looking forward to spending some quality time with you." She made suggestive eyes at her blond teammate, then seductively slid off her stool and began to saunter towards the door. Before she turned she had seen Naruto's face, which had turned purple in his surprise, his eyes taking up half of his face. She thought she could hear Iruka stifling a laugh.

"OK, Sakura-chan! It wasn't that I wasn't looking forward to spending time with you, it is just that I have all these sore muscles…they make me cranky. And I need a bath. But now that you are here, I realize what perfect timing it is!"

Sakura turned and looked at him. "Oh?"

"I just realized you can give me a bath and rub out all of these sore muscles! I think I may have pulled one here—," to which he pointed at his inner thigh.

It was Sakura's turn to gape at her teammate. Iruka wasn't even bothering to hide his glee anymore.

"NARUTO-PERVERT!!!"

"I guess I can pass on the bath, but stay for dinner. I think I can make room in my stomach for another bowl."

Sakura sighed and sat back home. These were the good times. After the second failed attempt to bring Sasuke home, she and Naruto had become much closer. She knew that he sometimes viewed her as more than a friend, but they had figured out that they couldn't work out. Not with their history, and especially not without their third teammate. _Sasuke_. She was thinking about him again. Did she ever really stop?

Naruto ordered her ramen and his own.

"Naruto, you are going to make yourself sick eating so much right after a hard practice."

"Please, Saku-Chan. I know my limits-- I've been eating ramen for longer than you have been alive!"

"Idiot, we are the same age!"

When she almost tipped over Iruka's tea reaching across him to hit Naruto, Iruka's laughter was loud enough to be heard a block away.

"Alright, you two—that was my cue to go."

"Noooo, don't leave!" They said in unison. In their time back in Konoha, Naruto and Sakura had become especially close to the chuunin teacher. He served as a mentor for when things got tough, and was in many ways the only family Naruto had.

"Ah, but I have some papers to grade. Besides, with all of your flirting, I know where this evening is heading!" He winked at his former students and left before they could retaliate. Iruka knew better though, as did they. The flirting had been a recent development in the past year as both had turned twenty. Naruto hadn't grown up much, but he was much more secure in the relationship with his pink-haired friend. They did tease and he often made perverted comments directed to her. She had stopped hitting him (at least as hard) and sometimes even blushed quite prettily.

"I talked to Kaka-sensei."

Naruto's smile disappeared. He knew that when Sakura sounded serious, he needed to listen. "About…him?"

"No, though that has been on my mind. I talked to him about getting better."

"Better!? You are amazing, Sakura! You are freakishly strong and can heal just about anyone and you are drop dead gorgeous while doing it and—"

"Oh, Naruto, thanks, but…"

"But what? What else is there?"

"Well…I can't fight on my own yet."

"Bah, you kick my ass every day!!"

She had to laugh at that. "Yeah, but with you it is a given." She winked at Naruto as he tried to think of a come back.

"Well, WELL—," When nothing came, he just shrugged his shoulders. Ok, so he had grown up a lot more than she gave him credit for. He knew when to back off now, at least with her. His enemies were not so lucky, Sakura had seen that proven again and again. "What did that old lecher tell you?"

"He told me _Shogi."_

"What the hell is Shogi?"

"A game, idiot."

"He told you to get better playing a game? That makes no sense! You can just train more with me!!" Naruto flexed his arms, kissing his biceps and making his companion laugh again. He's too good at making me laugh. She had wished on more than one occasion that she could return his feelings, but they both knew that would never happen. Sad, because she knew he was probably better for her than Sasuke.

"He said it would teach me to think, and that is certainly something I can't learn from you! I just don't know where I should start! I guess those old men in the park?"

"The old men in the park!? The perverted ones that are out there everyday!?"

They heard a rustle behind them as Iruka re-entered the ramen hut.

"What about old perverted men? Are you talking about Kakashi-sensei again?" The tan ninja walked over to the counter, grabbing a black leather billfold off of it. "Sorry to eavesdrop, but I forgot my wallet!"

"We were talking about the old men that play Go and Shogi everyday in the park."

This caught Iruka's interest. Of course, usually Naruto's and Sakura's conversations were amusing, but they did not generally discuss anything involving long strategy games. "What about them?"

"Kaka-sensei recommended I play Shogi if I want to become a better solo ninja, and those are the only people I can think of to play with."

Those men, Iruka knew, were notorious for staring down pretty young women of the village. He heard once they had written a list of one hundred different names for women's breasts. Someone as pretty and as…volatile as Sakura probably would not have a good learning experience with those men.

Suddenly, the perfect answer hit Iruka.

"You should ask Nara Shikamaru. He is probably the best player this village has seen in over one hundred years! Plus…" Iruka's face fell and his voice dropped with compassion. "He could probably use the distraction."

Sakura grimaced. Shikamaru… It was a good idea, she knew it. He was still the lazy ninja he had always been, of course, and they had been tentative friends from way back when Tsunade had pared them together for several missions after Sasuke had left. But his demeanor had changed so much, since…

She knew Iruka was right.

"Thanks, Iruka-sensei!"

- - - - -

That night Sakura walked Naruto after he said he stomach felt a little weak. She tried not to laugh too hard at him when he threw up ramen-bile in an alley.

"I told you so," she murmured as she stroked his hair off of his face.

"Uhhhhhh….Sakura," Naruto whispered. She leaned down closer so that she could hear him better. "Sakura, come closer, I need to ask a favor…" She came so close her cheek was next to his.

"What is it, Naruto?"

Even though he had just been vomiting his guts out a moment before, Naruto turned his huge smile to her, clamped an arm around her neck and pretended to faint. Her quick reflexes easily allowed her to catch him, looking worried.

"Can you take me home and play 'doctor' with me!?" He winked and puckered his lips up big for a kiss. Instead of a kiss, though, Sakura dropped (or maybe threw) her teammate down.

"NO WAY BARF-BREATH!!!"

They both laughed and she walked him the rest of the way to his apartment.

- - - - -

A/N: And so I'm back. My semester just ended, which is pretty awesome. In theory I will be able to update 1-4 times a week! But of course, I also am trying to get my warcraft character to lvl 70…so we'll see! Now, I admit this is probably more enjoyable to the general public than an OC fic. And in the end, I'll probably have more fun with this one!

Until next time, have a great week!


	2. Chapter 2

These were his favorite kind of afternoons. Slow, hot, and most importantly, quiet. Shikamaru inhaled deeply, loving the feeling of the smoke from the cigarette dangling from his lips filling his lungs. Stretching his arms behind his head, he sighed and closed his eyes. The sunlight felt hot on his face, and he loved how it was bright even with his eyes closed. Yep, days like this could not be better.

Of course, just as he got comfortable, a shadow fell over him, blocking out the warm sun.

"Eh, that's dangerous, you know." Female voice. Not as high pitched as Ino's. No stuttering like Hinata. Opening one eye slightly confirmed his suspicions. _Haruno Sakura. _

"Sheesh, what's dangerous?"

"Drifting off with a lit cigarette in your mouth."

Opening his eyes all the way, he squinted that the pick haired girl hovering above him.

"Can I help you with something, Sakura? And this isn't dangerous, I know exactly what I'm doin—," but all of the moving of his mouth caused a large hunk of still-burning ash to fall onto his chin. The burning caused him to jerk up, rubbing furiously at the wound, which only made it burn more. Hearing Sakura's laughter in the background didn't help at all. Sheesh. And it had been such a good, quiet day.

"I told you so."

Shikamaru only rolled his eyes. His chin really hurt where the ash had burnt the skin. _Great. I will probably scar from this_. His day was getting worse by the second. He glanced at her, hoping he looked as irritated as he felt. "Like I said, can I help you with something, Sakura?"

"Here, let me see that." Her slender hands reached toward his face. One hand moved his own hand away from the burn while they other lay on his cheek softly. His eyes grew wide at the intimate gesture—the situation had just become very awkward for him. His body tensed as she reached the hand she had just used to move his up and her thumb was blue with chakra. She slowly dragged the thumb over the burn mark. Instantly he felt cooling chakra pouring into the burn. While the injury felt better, he did not. Shikamaru was not good with girls. Even with a persistent female teammate like Ino he always kept his distance. After all, he grew up with his nagging mother, his nagging teammate and her nagging rival—the girl who happened to be healing his face at that moment. He had therefore learned from an early age that girls were crazy, loud and unpredictable—three things he avoided at all costs.

"There, now it won't scar." Sakura sat back on her heels, pulling her hands away from his face and resting her fingertips on the ground on either side of her for balance. "Better?"

She was still sitting closer than Shikamaru liked, and he remained tensed. His fingers absentmindedly felt over the skin she had just fixed—there was no real sign of the burn, only a minute residual pain. _She is good._ "Yes, thank you." Rather than repeat his question again, he sat and waited.

"I was wondering if…you wanted to play Shogi sometime? With me?"

This really did catch Shikamaru by surprise. His surprise was made even greater when he felt a burning sensation on his inner thigh—the cigarette! When he had sat up for his face, it had fallen out of his mouth onto the ground. Apparently it had not gone out, because it had just burned through his pants. Jumping all the way up, he desperately swatted at his leg, trying to put the cigarette out. It slid down his pant leg, brushing skin here and there, pinpricking him with pain. "NOOOO!"

Sakura looked very cross and stood up to leave. "Fine, but you didn't have to be such a jerk about it."

"NOOO! NO MY LEG!!! IT'S BURNING!!" As he screamed, the cigarette fell out of his pants onto the ground and he quickly put it out.

Again, Sakura's laughter reminded him of his irritation with the whole situation. In less than fifteen minutes his lovely, quiet afternoon had turned into pain and misery. _Troublesome_. Obviously women brought trouble with them every where.

He could see Sakura's fingertips glowing again. Very aware of the discreet locations of his burns, he waved his hands in front of him and shook his head. "Uh, no, but thank you! Let's just leave those alone! I can take care of them later!"

Sakura raised an eyebrow but her chakra disappeared. "Ok, but those will probably scar."

She may be a medic ninja who was used to every area of people's bodies, but Shikamaru was embarrassed just by the thought of her being inside of his pants. _In my pants!?_ Shikamaru blushed and he quickly turned away from Sakura, hands in his pockets, trying very hard to look collected again. "I…haven't played Shogi in four years, Sakura. I'm not sure I would be a good opponent." It was true he hadn't played, and Sakura knew why. She could tell Shikamaru did not want to talk about it. Still, she needed this.

"Please, Shikamaru…I know. But it was Iruka-sensei who recommended you, and for my own needs I realize no one else would be as good!"

He turned to look at her and saw her eyes had gotten bigger and a little moist. He rolled his own eyes. She was doing that thing all the women did, trying to look weak and cute and pathetic so they could get their way. On top of that, Sakura was not even being subtle in her flattery of him. Plus healing his burn? She must really need something, though Shikamaru couldn't figure out what Shogi had to do with anything.

"Look, if you need to learn how to play, I can give you the names of some old playing friends of mine—they play in the park everyday. They would probably be a better teacher than me."

She cast her eyes down, looking as pathetic as she could. Shikamaru wished he hadn't looked at her, because he could feel his insides caving a little. _She doesn't understand what she is asking of me._ She obviously knew why he hadn't played, what was so important that she was practically begging him to help her now? Gah, why were women so troublesome?

"They can't help me, Shika, only you. I need more than just to learn how…Kakashi told me I needed to learn strategy. Tsunade herself has said you are the best strategist in Konoha. So it has to be you."

He shifted uncomfortably on his feet. He hated having his ass kissed and he wasn't sure he was too pleased with her calling him "Shika". Ino and his mother were the only ones who called him that, and only when they wanted something. Then again, Sakura wanted something, so he guessed it was fitting.

"Why do you need to learn strategy? Kakashi is quite an expert himself."

"That's just it. I depend so much on Naruto and Kakashi that I can't do things myself. If I'm ever going to get better, if I'm going to get…him back, then I need to do this on my own."

His resolve was slipping away. She was talking about the teammate she had lost, about Sasuke. Shikamaru was amazed she still had feelings for the boy when he had been gone for seven years. Even back then, Shikamaru couldn't understand the girls going crazy for the Uchiha heir. No sense of humor and more importantly, he could never relax…what was there to love? Still, Shikamaru knew what it was like to lose a team member all too well. Why'd he have to be good at that game? Why did Asuma ever teach it to him?

_Asuma_.

"Ok, I'll teach you. But it will probably bore you and don't start crying when I win and--,"he couldn't continue because Sakura had just enveloped him in an excruciatingly tight hug.

"THAAAAANK YOOOUUUUUUU!!!"

Her quick display of affection left him speechless and very, very uncomfortable.

Rolling his eyes, he knew what this meant.

This was going to be troublesome.

- - - - - -

Lighting a cigarette, Shikamaru sat outside on his apartment's porch. He was mentally exhausted from the day. Haruno Sakura was intelligent, and she had caught onto the game as far as instructions went quite fast. However, her temper was very much not suited to the game. The first ten games they played he beat her in five moves or less. When he saw the anger in her eyes, he realized he was going to need to be much more careful. The second ten games he had purposefully stretched out the game, beating her in ten to twenty moves.

"_ARE YOU GOING EASY ON ME!??" The pink haired kunoichi shook her fist dangerously at him. So…she knew. _

"_Eh, Sakura…you can't have it both ways. You can't be mad if I beat you quickly and you can't be mad if I wait to beat you. Are you telling me you don't want me to go easy on you?"_

"_No. If you go easy on me, I'll never get better."_

_They set up the board. She moved first. He moved. She looked confused at his choice, and then she moved again. He moved. She saw an opening, and she went for it, proudly capturing his piece. _

"_AHA!! I got the first piece! See? I'm not so bad!!"_

_While she was gloating, he moved his piece._

"_Check."_

_It took her a moment to understand what he had just said. _

"_Eh, check?"_

"_Yes. Check mate in one move."_

_She didn't believe him, and moved the only piece she saw she could move. Quickly he moved his piece. It was over._

"_Checkmate."_

He had gotten hit for that. She couldn't understand how he was able to beat him so quickly. He wasn't ready to explain to her that she needed to start thinking at least one move ahead, not just acting on instinct, but she was so angry she wasn't open for advice yet.

He had never played so many games in one day. Before, when he played the old men or…his former sensei, the game could take anywhere from thirty minutes to thirty days. With Sakura, it could be a matter of seconds. She was too predictable; she fell into each one of his traps. There was no effort in beating her.

He breathed in the smoke of his cigarette. The burning in his lungs felt good. It was cleansing to him, each cigarette he smoked, because the smell was able to remind him and the burn of the smoke inside of him felt like it was burning away the loneliness, at least temporarily.

Still, he had to admit that while his opponent had been easy, it had felt good to play again.

- - - - -

A/N: Probably not another update for a while, my weekend is over!


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: Thanks for my first few reviews—never necessary but always motivating! And a special thanks to Fake Compassion for catching a pretty big error in Sakura's surname—I changed it!

- - - - -

The first week was painful for both players. For Sakura, it was a huge ego bruise to beat so quickly time and time again. For Shikamaru, it felt like a waste of time—Sakura never learned form her mistakes, falling into his simple traps every time.

He moved his piece. Checkmate, again. Sakura's head fell into her hands. He understood how frustrated she felt, though for different reasons. When she didn't lift her head back up, though, he realized she was crying. He felt his body tense up—if there was one thing more troublesome than girls, it was girls who were crying. He didn't know how to operate in such situations.

"Ehh, Sakura?"

He heard sniffles and chokes as she tried to reign in her tears.

"Sakura…please." Shikamaru rolled his eyes. He felt more uncomfortable with this by the second. "We can, uh, stop playing if you'd like."

She lifted her red, tear-streaked face, her eyes locking onto his. They were large eyes, vibrant green and swimming with tears. Of course Shikamaru knew that the Haruno clan was known for the genetics that produced the bright green color in the iris, that the saline tears were simply reflecting light and were not actually luminous, but that didn't stop him from observing that her eyes were beautiful like that. However, the red streaky look of her skin and the slight dribble of mucous from her nose countered his moment with her eyes and made him even more agitated.

"This is just a game, Sakura, there is--," he started.

"That's just it! This is just a game, how can I be so horrible at it!?" She pulled out a handkerchief and began to clean herself up a bit, struggling to regain composure. She was just as embarrassed at her outburst as Shikamaru was. "You don't understand…I know I've grown in the past few years. I've always been good at learning things quickly and excelling in them. I learned to excel at hand to hand combat, and at healing, and at chakra control…you see? So to not be able to get a simple game is just _so_ frustrating!"

_Simple Game!? _Shikamaru closed his eyes—he needed to think. She wasn't seeing the game that wasn't really there, only the pieces and their functions. What he needed was an analogy, something that could help her see what her mistakes were. He thought about her team, her skills…her training._ Aha_. He had an idea.

"Sakura, when someone is rushed into the hospital with a cut on his torso, do you immediately heal it up?"

She thought about his question, confusion written on her face.

"No. I have to see if there is internal bleeding, if there is lowered blood pressure, if there is something inside that caused the laceration instead of an outside force--,"she kept thinking.

"Exactly. You don't rush to do the thing that seems obvious, which is to close up the wound. Eventually that may be the best move, but not until you've evaluated all other possibilities first, right? Or sometimes you find something you didn't see, and you realize that closing the wound up actually made the situation worse?"

"Yes, but…"

"Shogi is the same thing. Many moves are obvious." He pointed to the most blatant moves on the board for both sides. "See? But, if you stop and look at each piece individually, you can look at all of their different moves."

He looked in earnest at Sakura, but her face told her she wasn't quite getting it. Shikamaru sighed. This is so troublesome. Still, he persisted.

"Look. This obvious move? That is healing the cut right away. But you haven't checked the internal bleeding—," He pointed to another one of her pieces with a more subtle move. "Or the patients blood pressure—," Here he showed her different move yet another piece of hers could make. "Or, if there is something inside causing the laceration." With that, he showed her how she could move a piece in front of his, and after he took it, she could then move another piece into an even more strategic place and out of harm. Sakura's green eyes grew wide as she began to understand. "Do you get it?"

She smiled wide at him, showing him she finally understood. Her smile was inviting, and despite his best efforts, Shikamaru felt pretty good about teaching her something.

They set up the board again. She moved. He moved. She sat and looked at the board, her face scrunched in concentration. She moved, but he frowned. It had been a poor choice for her. He moved, trying to open something up for her, but she immediately moved a different piece. Frustrated with her, he moved again. It was her turn to frown, her eyes looking at all of the pieces. She touched one piece, but then quickly changed her mind and moved another piece. He moved. _Checkmate_.

It took her a moment to realize what had happened.

"DAMNIT!" Her fist came thundering down, throwing the board up and scattering pieces everywhere.

Shikamaru sighed. "Sakura, you aren't really looking. That game went too fast. Don't let time bother you. You need to look at each of your pieces, and then figure out all of the different ways they can move, what will happen each different time, when you think I'll move—"

"That's too complicated."

That was too much, and Nara Shikamaru stood up. He pulled out a cigarette, lit it and began to walk away. Why had he ever said yes to this? She didn't want to learn, because he was explaining it the same way he would to Iruka's students, half their age, but she wasn't listening. Sheesh. It was time for a nap.

"Please, wait." He didn't mean to, but he hesitated in his steps.

"Don't go. I'm…I'm sorry. You are trying, Shikamaru, I know, and I am being a horrible student. I know this is a big deal for you, teaching me this game and…I want to try again. Please give me another chance."

Sighing heavily, smoke rolling out of his mouth, he turned around and looked at her. She was doing the damned cute look thing again. It wasn't that, though, that made him reconsider. All of the frustrations aside, he had to admit it was fun to play again. He had been isolating himself steadily for years, to the point where even Ino and Chouji sometimes had trouble getting him to come out. The game and her company had been almost…nice.

"Ok, but here are the new rules for this game. You will move, I will move, and then we are finished for the day. We will keep the game in your apartment so that you can look at it over the night. The next day I will come again, you will move, I will move, same deal—you look it over for the night. We will do this until the game is over."

Her face blanched at the prospect of such a long game, but she knew she was on thin ice, so she nodded. He stood and looked at her, his eyebrow raised. When the pink-haired kunoichi didn't move, he finally shrugged, his hands shoved into his pockets.

"I don't know where you live, Haruno Sakura, so get the pieces and board and lead the way."

Sakura blushed and scrambled. Shikamaru sighed. This was going to be a long week.

- - - - -

"Checkmate."

It had been eight nights since the game had begun. Sakura looked ready to kill something. She had stayed up late every night, looking at that damned board, trying to figure out how to trick him, and he had still beat her after only eight days._ I'm never going to get this game._

"How did you do it? I thought so hard! Why don't I just give up now? Thanks for trying anyway, Shikamaru."

He looked at incredulously. "Do you not get it, Sakura!?"

Skeptically, she looked at him. What did he mean? "Get what?"

"It took eight nights."

"So?"

"I was beating you in four to five moves. This time you made it last three moves longer. That is definite improvement."

She scrunched her face and pouted. Still, what he said made sense. "It doesn't feel like improvement."

That made Shikamaru smile, and he realized how foreign the motion felt on his face. Had it been that long since he had smiled?

"So, Sakura…ready for the next game?"

It was her turn to smile and shake her head. "I'm not, but let's try anyway."

- - - - -

The next five games lasted forty-three days, the last game in itself in thirteen. Exhausted, Sakura sank onto her couch in defeat. Still, she found she felt slightly triumphant as well. Thirteen days. That meant it had taken him thirteen moves to beat her.

"You aren't going easy on me, are you?"

Shikamaru was seated in a chair across from her, lazily stretched out.

"Hmm? No, I am not going easy on you. You asked me not to."

"I know, it's just this last game…"

"You are allowed to believe you are getting better, you know. Confidence is also part of the game."

They sat in silence for a while, contemplating the game. Forty three days they had seen each other until it was now a part of their daily ritual. Sakura found the Jounin to be relaxing in his own lazy way. He was quiet, unlike Naruto, and didn't demand anything of her expect to make a move in the game.

Shikamaru, too, began to actually enjoy the daily visits. He was pleased to see Sakura trying new moves, not just the obvious ones. He also liked her apartment. Unlike his own, which was messy, hers was clean—bordering on sterile. He wondered if all medics kept their homes "hospital" clean. It also meant it smelt nice, like jasmine. There was only the necessary furniture and it was quiet to be in. He also liked Sakura in her apartment. It seemed to calm her and so there was a lot less of the crazy and the loud he typically associated with women.

They sat in silence as long as comfort would allow, but all too soon Shikamaru realized it was time to move. They were tentative friends, and just sitting in her house for too long was overstepping that bound.

"So…next game?"

Sakura rolled her eyes. "I don't think so, Shikamaru. I like this new technique, but I've been losing a lot of sleep."

"I don't want you to lose sleep on account of me--," though he shut up when he realized the implications of what he said. Stupid. _As if she would lose sleep because of you_.

Fortunately Sakura just chuckled quietly, winking at Shikamaru. "I was referring to the game, though you are cute enough to lose sleep over!" When he turned red and shoved his hands in his pockets muttering something about "troublesome" she laughed out loud.

He was at a loss for words. People kept calling him a genius, but in situations like this, he was worse than Naruto. He felt embarrassed at blushing over what was obviously harmless flirting. Still, he was a little surprised she had so openly flirted with him. That meant she felt comfortable with him. This realization made him even more embarrassed.

"Shikamaru?"

Startled, he looked at her. "Eh?"

"You were staring off. Maybe it is you who are losing a little sleep, hmmm?" She winked again and walked into the kitchen, leaving him in his chair. He rubbed his face with his hands, trying to bring himself around. When he was ready, he followed the sounds of her rustling around.

"Are you hungry, Shika?"

That nickname again. She had got into the habit of calling him by it every now and then, and it always made him feel a little uncomfortable. He was still used to hearing it when women wanted something from him, so when she said it, he always tensed as if waiting for a blow.

"No, thank you."

"I guess if I can have a week off, we could start playing again. I just need to step back a bit, have my nights back."

Hm. Taking off for a week would mean no daily visits, no escaping into her apartment. It was a place Ino couldn't find him, or his mother, or even Tsunade. He realized he didn't want to lose that.

"What if we stopped—"

"NO!!" He sighed. Being interrupted was a pet peeve of his, and she knew it, as it had happened several times in the past few weeks. "I'm sorry, continue, please."

"As I was saying, we could stop doing two moves a day and start playing a game at a time again—no nights to think about it. I think you understand now what I was saying about patience. But if you are learning battle strategy, you won't have a night to think about your next move. Let's implement the patience with the pressure. What do you think? Are you ready?"

She frowned. She probably would have liked to be at the point where it took him at least fifteen moves to beat her. Still, she couldn't afford to be so tired. It had been affecting her training currently, not helping. He was right.

"Ok. But tomorrow, not today. Today, stay and have some lunch with me!"

He wanted to. It was just a lunch offer. But something in him rose up against the invitation.

"No thank you. I will see you tomorrow."

He left. Walking home, he pulled out a cigarette. She never allowed him to smoke in her house, which meant he was smoking two less cigarettes a day. Why hadn't he stayed for lunch? He was hungry, and she was just trying to be nice. He knew, of course, that he was a little afraid. Being a ninja meant accepting the consequences of losing, but losing hurts. _But it can't hurt as much if I keep my distance. _

Geez, this was getting troublesome.


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: Ha! I bet you thought I had forgotten about this fic, eh? Well you were right! I did! So there you go. And the problem with dropping such a young fiction for too long is that, if you are old and forgetful like me, you forget where you were going with it! HO NO!

- - - - -

She was a little let down. The games were going well, but any attempt Sakura made at being friends outside of the game Shikamaru just turned down. No lunches or dinners, no nothing. Just the game, and then he pulled out another damned cigarette and left her. Every time she watched him go, his slow gait taking him away from her home. She liked the idea of them being friends. She liked the idea of helping people, and Shikamaru needed help, even if he wouldn't admit to it. He could pretend all he wanted, but she sensed his loneliness…she just wanted to help. After all, helping people heal was her job, and she never saw a job she couldn't at least try.

But he wasn't having any of it.

Today had been the same. He had come over, taking time to finish a cigarette outside before stepping in to sit down and play. The smell used to irritate her and she would nag him about the bad habit. She knew why he has picked it up but she also knew that continuing to smoke meant his refusal to heal. Still, the smell was a part of the daily ritual, and one she enjoyed. Things had been calm in Konoha, and most of the ninja were home, helping around the village, training new groups. Kakashi was helping Kurenai with a new group—she was just now ready to begin being a sensei again. Naruto and his perverted sensei had left again, scouting for information on Itachi. How she had longed to go with them…but she stayed for the game. It was important for her to improve. But slow times meant little need for her at the hospital, and with Naruto gone and Kakashi busy, she needed the daily visits as much as Shikamaru.

He had come in, sitting down. She had smelled the lingering smoke, closing her eyes before bringing tea over and sitting across from him. To her credit, the games had become long enough that the tea was necessary. It took him over twenty moves to beat her. It meant her defensive strategies were getting better. But she was not to a point where she was even trying to counter—she just tried to not lose as long as possible. Today she had tried to counter and lost in ten moves, a serious set back for her.

"Damnit, Sakura." His voice was harsh, his disapproval dripping in his tone. It had surprised her…usually she was the one upset.

"What?"

"What exactly was that move?" Shikamaru had been glaring at her, clearly disappointed. That look and the tone of his voice stung her.

"I…I was trying something new. Offense. I didn't—"

"Stupid." He interrupted her_. He hates to be interrupted, so why is he cutting me off? Why is he being so mean?_

Shikamaru had gotten up and started to put his vest back on, getting ready to leave.

"Wait, we can play again. I'm…I'm sorry, for whatever it is I did. But we have time, and I made tea, and—"

"No. One game a day, that is the rule. Think about that tonight so you have a better plan for tomorrow's game. A _much_ better plan."

And with that, he had left, her face watching him go, brow knit in confusion.

- - - - - -

_Shikamaru, you are stupid, stupid, stupid_.

It was probably a good thing that she had decided to move offensively. While their games had gotten longer, she was inevitably just teaching herself how to run away as long as possible. Of course she would want to try to get him. He wasn't mad at her at all, but he had certainly been an ass to her. Just because they had become sort of friends didn't know she could read his mind, didn't know that he had already been high strung when he came over. She couldn't have known that he had needed the time at her apartment. Time to hide, to unwind, to think. But when the game ended so quickly, it had caught him by surprise. If he had stayed after…it would have opened the door to her for a closer friendship. So he was mad because he had wanted to stay at her place and couldn't if he was to keep his distance.

Shit.

Earlier, before their Shogi date, there had been an incident with Temari that had left him unnerved. As a strategist, there was nothing more Shikamaru hated than to feel out of control. That morning Temari had been in control, had almost made him lose himself, and that was not something he could have recovered from before heading over to Sakura's.

- - - - - -

_A knock at his door. _

_He went to open it, surprised to find the Sand village's ambassador leaning in the doorframe. She looked windswept and beautiful…and sly. Like a cat about to get cream. _

_He rolled his eyes. "Eh, what are you doing here, Temari?"_

_She reached her hand out, a finger lightly grazing his bare chest. He had forgotten he was just in his workout pants, he muscled torso exposed. Her touch made goose bumps on his skin and he was suddenly very aware of the feeling of being cornered. _

"_No hello, you naughty boy? How rude. You were supposed to meet me at the gate this morning. I came to see why you weren't there and I find you lounging around…not even dressed."_

_She would have continued to run her finger over his flesh had he not step back, turning and entering his apartment, trying to regain his composure. _

"_You are mistaken, Temari. I am no longer your Konoha escort and you know that. Ibisu should have met you at the gate, not I. Was he not there?"_

_She stepped in behind him, leaning her fan against the wall. "That man? He was there. But I had requested you. It has been a long time, Nara."_

_The name sent shivers down Shikamaru's spine. After the Gaara rescue mission, Temari had come to regroup in Konoha. It had been hard on her to almost lose her brother. Before Shikamaru had left on that mission, his last one with Asuma, he had been of great comfort to Temari. In many ways. When they had been together intimately, she had always called him by his surname. She had claimed it helped her stay detached. _

Detached? Then why had she come back

_He kept his back to her, his head began to hurt. Absentmindedly his hand rubbed his temple._

"_It…has been a long time. Why are you here, Temari?" He turned and looked at her. Their eyes locked. He couldn't tell what he saw there, but it looked too close to amusement for him to feel more at ease. Even with their history, women always made him uncomfortable._

"_Nara, you know why I am here. I know it has been a while but…I was hoping to see you. All of you."_

_His mouth hardened at her bluntness. But he couldn't blame her entirely. He had always hated these games she played, her coyness, but she was a real woman. Much more woman than Ino had been. Temari only played games after she already caught her prey, but she was mature enough to know what she wanted and to get it. That had appealed to him, because it made the whole thing so much simpler. Less troublesome. They had been a good match, for a while. _

_But after the mission with Asuma, "a while" came to an end. He didn't want any kind of relationship, even if it was just sex. It was too much work.If there was one thing Nara Shikamaru hated, it was work. Especially work involving women. He had helped Kurenai as much as possible, but watching her pain and how it made his worse exponentially …he didn't think he could handle being in her place, losing the person he loved. It was a better strategy to not love at all. _

"_That isn't going to happen, Temari."_

_She came over to him and he didn't move away. Her hands smoothed over the skin of his shoulders, his chest, his stomach. "I can help you make it happen, if you want…" and her hands began to dip into the top of his pants. _

_Quickly he moved her hands away and took a step back._

"_No."_

"_No? Look, you need this as much as I do. Probably more so." Again, the bluntness. _

"_I don't need it and I am not interested."_

_Instead of backing off, she sat down and stared at him, her face thoughtful. _

"_Is there someone else?"_

_He wasn't sure why, but a flash of pink hair had flashed through his mind. _

_He sighed. This was getting worse by the minute. "There is no one else."_

"_Because if there was—"  
_

"_There isn't."_

"—_I would respect your distance."_

_That caught him by surprise, and Shikamaru looked at Temari. "Why?"_

"_Nara, we just had sex to make me feel better. I like to believe it made you feel better, too. But if you were actually seeing someone, I would back off."_

"_And if I'm not?"_

"_Then come to bed already."_

_With that, she had stood up and, in one fluid moment, taken off her Kimono. Statuesque, beautiful and completely naked, she walked back to his bed. She was so much of a woman that even when stepping over the clutter in his apartment, she was graceful. _

_Shikamaru sighed, looked at the clock, pulled on a shirt and shoes and left Temari waiting for him. _

_He walked to his Shogi date, angry and pensive. _

- - - - - - -

He had been sitting in the café across from his apartment all afternoon, but he could tell she was still in his apartment. Temari was more patient than Ino or his mother. She wouldn't scramble to come find him, because she had the patience to wait him out. He saw her figure dipping and moving around his place.

She is probably cleaning up, making herself at home.

She had stayed with him before, but not for the past few visits. Why was she doing this?

Sighing, he realized he wasn't up to seeing her yet. She had really shaken him. She was right—he could use it. He didn't need it, but seeing Temari naked, her commanding voice telling him to come to bed-- he was tempted to do just that.

_So why aren't you?_

Because. Because of the relationship, the stickiness, the trouble.

_She said she just wanted sex. You want sex. There shouldn't be a problem. _

That flash of pink hair. That was the problem. And it frustrated him, because it was not a problem he could figure out. Why had Sakura crossed his mind (however briefly) while Temari had been interrogating him? He searched himself and couldn't find any concrete feelings for the pink haired kunoichi. It was just her soothing presence, probably, since he felt anything but soothed with Temari.

Thinking it through, he decided to decide about Temari the next day. He was too confused to go up there now, where he would probably just end up going to bed with her. He would go to an inn, or Chouji's, and sleep on it.

As he exited the café, though, he found himself going by the ramen shop. Ramen? He didn't really like it. But he peeked inside, just in case…

In case of what? In case she was there with Naruto.

She wasn't.

"Um, can I help you with something?"

Amane, the proprietor's daughter, was standing behind the counter looking at him quizzically.

"Uh…"

"Did you want something to eat?"

He was hungry, but ramen?

"Yes."

He left there with a giant to go bag in his hands. His feet were carrying him, his mind shut off and the guilt giving his body direction.

Halfway to his destination, it started raining. Shikamaru was too lazy to move out of it. He maintained his pace, getting thoroughly soaked in the process.

Finally, her door was there.

It was still trouble, but this seemed like the smaller trouble out of the two for the night.

He hoped.

Sighing, he reached out and knocked.

- - - - - - -

Nothing could have been more of a surprise than the sight that greeted her. It was late, and she had been worried that there was an emergency at the hospital. But instead of a messenger telling her to come quick, there was a very wet and disheveled Shikamaru at her door carrying a large bag.

She just stared at him.

_Great, she is probably mad at me still from this afternoon. What was I thinking?_

Shikamaru started to turn to go. He heard a laugh that caught him off guard.

"Shika, what the hell are you doing here? Come in, you are soaked!" Before he could turn away completely, she grabbed his shoulders and ushered him into her apartment. She grabbed the bag and, smelling the food, began to take it into the kitchen, calling directions to him as she went.

"Take off your shoes in the hallway, please, and stand there. I'll bring a towel."

He did as he was told; embarrassed as his shoes sloshed the water they had in them all over her floor. She came back holding a large towel out to him.

"Here, dry off a bit."

She sat near by and watched as he tried his best to sop up the water in his pants, his shirt, and his hair, which seemed to have most of it. His hair tie must have come out when he had been drying his hair, because as he bent down to try and mop up the floor, his long hair came tumbling forward, obscuring his vision. The towel was so soaked he was just pushing water around, and his clothing and hair were still dripping.

Her laugh came again. It sounded like bells to his ears, and he looked up. Her eyes were merry and she struggled to maintain a straight face.

"If you could just see yourself!" She couldn't keep her face straight after that and doubled over with laughter. He turned bright red, realizing what she was probably seeing—long, crazy hair, soaking clothes…he must look like a fool. Sheesh.

"I…I brought you some dinner. Sakura, I'm—"

But she held up her hand, signaling for him to shut up.

"You can apologize later. First, you need a shower, or you are going to get sick from being cold."

His face flushed—she had called him out on needing to apologize. But he did feel very cold and when Haruno Sakura told you to shut up, you did just that.

"Follow me, and try not to drip too much on the carpet."

He followed her up small hardwood stairs to the loft above. Her apartment was not large, and instead of a complete upstairs, it just had a small loft. In fact, one could see up there a little standing below, half of her bedroom exposed. Her bedroom was small and simple. Bed, dresser, rug on the floor, a large window. He looked at the window, awed and a little jealous. It cut out from the wall, a small window seat built in—the perfect nook for staring at the clouds and daydreaming.

"Shika? The bathroom is this way." He flushed, embarrassed for being caught looking around the room. She went into her small bathroom and he followed. He felt awkward—it was a small space, and she was standing close to him.

"I'm sorry, I don't actually have a shower, only a bathtub, but there is plenty of hot water and towels in the cabinet next to the sink. While you run a bath—a hot one to get you warm—I'll try and find some dry clothes for you."

"Sakura, this really isn't necessary, and I have to be going really…"

"Spare me, Shikamaru. It is raining even harder outside. If you have to go, it will be after this storm eases up a bit."

She walked out and closed the door behind him, leaving him alone.

He looked in her mirror. He looked ridiculous. Sighing, he started running a bath and stripping off his wet clothes.

- - - - - -

Once Sakura heard the bathwater start, she smiled a little. She wasn't sure what Shikamaru was doing at her home, but she was glad he had come. He probably didn't realize, but it was getting close to the anniversary of the day Sasuke left Konoha.

_Didn't realize? Of course he does, stupid! He was in charge of the squad sent to bring Sasuke back! He, and so many of her friends, had almost died on that mission_.

Remembering, she went to her closet. She opened the door and pulled down a small box from the top shelf. Carrying it with her, she sat on the bed. Opening the lid, _his_ smell drifted out, forcing her to close her eyes against the tears threatening to come. Gingerly she pulled out the pair of pants, his essence surrounding her. Holding them out before her, she inspected closely. They would fit. She folded the pants and set them on the bed. She started to pull out the matching shirt, but realized that not only was Shikamaru too big for it, but also she…she couldn't let anyone wear it. The fan stitched into the back was too painful for her to even look at. Those tears she had been fighting began to fall down her face.

Luckily, she didn't get too lost in her thoughts before she could hear the bathtub draining. Had she been sitting there the whole time!? She crammed the shirt back into box and rushed to put it back in the closet. Closing the door, she thought quickly—she didn't have a shirt big enough for him, she knew. Grabbing a small blanket that had been draped on her window seat, she began to fold it when she heard the door open.

She turned quickly. There was Shikamaru; towel tied around his waist, rivulets from his hair down his much muscled torso, look of surprise in his eyes. Gasping and blushing, she turned away quickly.

Shikamaru was shocked to see Sakura still in the room, but it actually amused him to see her turn away so quickly. The bath had helped him more than he could have known it would. He only had a shower, and it was a very relaxing change to soak in the hot water. It had also given him time to collect himself and he felt, at least under the circumstances, much more like the Shikamaru he wanted to be. Calm, collected, aloof. In the hot water, he allowed himself to admit why he had come to Sakura's. He had been a dick that afternoon and as her comrade and, he admitted, her friend, he needed to make amends. Also, her place was the best place for him to think, he realized. If he could eat dinner at the serene apartment he could go to Chouji's or even his parents for the night without being such a mess. He still wasn't entirely comfortable opening the door of friendship to Sakura, but they could play a game and he would just be careful to stay a few steps ahead of her, warding off any bit of closeness.

Of course, there she was blushing and apologizing for catching him in a towel and it struck him as pretty amusing. Feeling more in control, he remembered her teasing him before about being cute enough to lose sleep over. Time for a little payback.

"Sakura? Why are you turned away?" He was able to keep any hint of jest out of his voice.

"Shikamaru, I'm sorry, I lost track of time, I didn't mean to spy, I'll just go—"

"It is no big deal, Sakura. I'm sure that as a medical ninja you are used to seeing men's bodies, right?"

"Well, yes, but this is different, because…"

"Because I am handsome enough to lose sleep over?"

When she heard that, her face turned a dark shade of red, but a little anger was mixed in with her shame. She looked at him, hand on her hip.

"Look here, buddy, don't you be getting any ideas—"

He allowed himself to crack a small grin, and she realized he had just been joking.

She thrust the blanket into his arms, almost causing him to lose the towel.

"I don't have a shirt for you, use this, there are some pants on the bed."

She went into the bathroom and collected his wet clothes, going down the stairs before he could protest.

It had felt good to joke around with her, but he did wonder why she had still been upstairs. Surely it hadn't taken her that long to find clothes for him?

He went to the bed and saw the folded navy pants. When he held them out, he realized they were men's pants, though just a bit small for him. He could fit in them, but they weren't as loose as he liked and the cuffs came above his ankles—they were a shorter man's pants. He wondered whose they could be. Naruto's? Kakashi's? He was a little taller than Naruto, so it would make sense. And Sakura was his teammate…lots of teammates were closer than just friends. He wondered as he pulled them on.

Drying his hair as much as possible, he finger combed it into submission. He wore it very long now, almost as long as Neji, though he still pulled it back usually. Having his hair tie broke meant that couldn't happen, and all Sakura had were girly head bands. It still was wavy, but it usually only got into his trademark poof because he slept on it wet so often. Wrapping the blanket around his shoulders, Shikamaru headed downstairs.

He found Sakura in the kitchen, getting the dinner he had brought ready. She had put everything on a try and was carrying it towards the living room.

"Are we eating in there?"

"Yes, I thought we could start a game while we ate. We don't have to finish tonight, and I won't try any offensive moves this time."

He blushed, realizing she was scolding him for his attitude earlier that afternoon.

"Sakura, I am sorry. I was out of line. I had…_things_ on my mind. You should start thinking offensively, and I am actually impressed you started that on your own."

"I know, I just wanted to hear you say you were wrong."

He started to get mad, but she changed the subject before he could contest.

"I didn't realize you ate ramen, Nara Shikamaru!"

"Eh," he shrugged, "I don't. But I knew you always ate it with Naruto. I assumed you liked it."

"Sort of, but I'm actually burnt out on it now."

They both looked at the ramen, and then at each other. Shikamaru sighed heavily and made Sakura laugh.

"I have some other food. Sit here and set up the board while I get us some _not _ramen dinner." She laughed as she carried the tray back into the kitchen.

Shikamaru sat down, enjoying again the relaxation he felt in this apartment. He had been right to come here. His fingers began to set up the board quickly. He hadn't realized that there was a fire place and that Sakura must have set up a quick fire while he had been getting dressed. The blanket was making it hard to move around, and he began to feel toasty as well. It was embarrassing to sit bare-chested in her house, but it was necessary. He shrugged off the blanket. After all, while he had only been joking, he really did not have anything Sakura hadn't seen before in the hospital.

She came back in carrying the tray, raised her eyebrows for a moment at him, then sat down without spilling a thing.

"I had some noodles, tofu and onions. It isn't much, but…"

"It isn't ramen, so it I am happy." In fact, it was delicious. Shikamaru was so lazy he never cooked. But Sakura apparently was comfortable in the kitchen. And she seemed to like what he liked—simple dishes, nothing too troublesome.

She handed him a glass and poured something hot into it.

"What is this?"

"Sake." He rolled his eyes. While no where near as bad as her mentor, Sakura had developed quite a taste for the alcohol.

"Thank you. I can't have too much, I have to leave after this game."

"We need to make it a long game, then."

His mind stopped. _Is she coming on to me? It sounded like…a proposition._ Could he not get away from women today?

"I just washed your clothes and set them out to dry, so we need to make it a long game so that they have time to dry all the way and for the rain to ease up."

_Oh_.

She made the first move. She was trying a new strategy, it seemed.

The game began. She was going slowly. In between moves, they both ate a few bites in silence, the crackle of the fire the only sound. She refilled their glasses.

"That is it for me on the sake, Sakura."

"Sure."

Several moves later, she filled his glass again and he didn't protest. He liked the warm feeling the alcohol burned through his body, and it made his mind more at ease. The silence and the sake made it easy for him to think about Temari. He was going to have to kick her out. She would probably already know this because he wasn't returning tonight. He thought they could salvage a tentative friendship if he chose his words carefully with the Sand ninja.

His eyes wandered down to the pants, his ankles poking out. The sake made him feel more comfortable asking, and the flush on Sakura's cheeks from the drinks made him hopeful she would answer. He was curious about how deep her feelings were for Naruto when she had come to him originally for help about Sasuke.

_Sasuke_.

Of course. He couldn't believe he hadn't forgotten about what time it was. The navy on Naruto? Sheesh, he was getting slow. Clearly the pants he was wearing were Uchiha Sasuke's. Why would Sakura be so at ease with him hanging out so late at night when he had been so mean earlier? This must have been a hard day for her, and he felt like even more of an asshole for his actions earlier that afternoon. He realized that his subconscious remembrance of that day was probably what made Temari's approach even more unwanted. He remembered Sakura crying at the gate, Naruto's promise to bring Sasuke back…

Sasuke. How could she still be in love with him? Yet she obviously was.

"I'm glad you had some men's pants on hand, Sakura."

She looked up, suspicion in her eyes. She studied his face. Sakura looked at those brown eyes, calm as always. Shikamaru's hair was drying in waves, smoother than she would have thought. Usually he had that ridiculous ponytail, but down…it was actually quite lovely. She looked at his calm face, and came to an understanding.

"Just ask what you really want to ask Shikamaru. We are already in one game—"she pointed at the Shogi board. "I don't want to start another."

While he was taken aback, Shikamaru was also impressed. She had figured out where he was going based on very little information. He wasn't sure the Sakura from a couple of weeks ago could have come to this conclusion as quickly. He wondered if it was because her mind was getting sharper or if she knew him well enough now to read him. Probably a little bit of both, and that idea was simultaneously comforting and discomforting.

"Why do you have Sasuke's pants? How do I fit in them? When he left, he was only thirteen."

She looked at him, sadness taking over her features. She looked down at the board, moved one of her pieces, and then looked back at him, composed.

"You are half right. They are Sasuke's pants, but I think they were probably Itachi's first. I wondered why they were so big, but the style is more Itachi's. I imagine that…that maybe Sasuke wore them occasionally, alone, after his brother…you know."

"Yes. That makes sense. I was half right, and you answered half of my question." He reached down and countered her move. "Why is it that you have them?"

She stared at the board, her face quiet and pensive. He could see that she was trying to detach herself from the emotions using the game. It probably wasn't healthy for her, she probably needed to cry, but he was glad. This situation was tense enough already, and he hated crying girls.

"When we came back from the second attempt to retrieve Sasuke, I realized that I still had feelings for him. I had done so well suppressing those feelings, to the point where I had convinced myself I just wanted him back as a teammate and a friend. But then he was there, and I touched him, and I could smell him. All of the emotions came tumbling back." She reached down and moved a piece. It was a good move, and Shikamaru was surprised. She had not taken the obvious route. "So when we came back, I went through this phase where I tried to do the things he did, see what he saw, to try and understand why…why things were the way they were." She paused, and Shikamaru didn't mind waiting. He understood all too well.

When his team came back without Asuma, he had begun smoking. He tried to learn to fight more with his fists, had even tried to fall in love with Kurenai and take care of her. None of it had worked, and he was stuck with Asuma's nasty habit of smoking but none of the humor, kindness or compassion his former sensei had possessed.

"One day—"She continued, "I broke into the Uchiha complex. I know it is off-limits, but I needed to see, you know? And I found his room. In it, I found those pants and a shirt and they smelled like him, and it was the smell that had brought it all back and made me remember. So I took them, and have had them."

Shikamaru understood what a big deal it was that she had let him wear them. After a shower, they were sure to absorb some of his own smell, traces of Sasuke slowly disappearing. He also had to admit it was curious that she had let him wear something so precious to her. He would have to think about this later.

He moved, his pieces falling into place for the final blow. He watched her and couldn't tell if her face of frustration was because she recognized the beginning of the end of the game, or because of what she had just told him.

"Sakura?"

"Yes."

"Thank you for your kindness tonight. I know today is not easy for you."

She just nodded. She moved a piece. It was a poor move and sped his plan up by several moves. He had a feeling it was on purpose, that she wanted the game over. But he wasn't ready. He made a silly move as well—on purpose. Her eyebrow raised at him, her eyes suspicious. _She had better see how much she has improved, that she can even tell I made that move to drag this out_.

"What are you doing, Shikamaru?"

"What are you talking about?"

"You were going to finish this game in the next three moves, I could tell. Now I am not sure what you are doing." _She even knew how many moves it would have taken me_. She was so intelligent it took him a moment to refocus. Well, she had been so honest with him, he might as well be honest with her.

"I am not ready to go home."

She smirked, trying to joke despite how sad she still felt. "Oh?"

He didn't play into her bait, though. _Distance, Shikamaru. Remember, keep your distance_. "I have an unwanted house guest who refuses to leave."

"Who?"

"Temari."

She managed to keep her face straight, she thought, but Sakura was surprised. She had always suspected the two were lovers a couple of years ago, mostly because Naruto had made so much fun of Shikamaru…but if Temari _had_ been his lover, then…

"Temari is unwanted? I don't know, if I were you—" She was just trying to keep the tone light, but Shikamaru shook his head. This was, apparently, no joking matter for him.

"I came here tonight because I needed to figure out what to do with her."

Surprisingly for Sakura, the words hit her like punches, and she wasn't sure why. "I thought you came to make amends."

"That too."

"How am I any help about Temari?"

Shikamaru was not good with women. He did not see that Sakura was hurt by his intentions and could not understand that what he said could make or break her that moment.

"It isn't you. It is your apartment. Maybe it is the feng-sui, or the fact that no one ever knows I come here, but I am able to relax here and think."

Sakura felt very used. He wasn't coming here for her friendship. He was coming to hide. He wasn't telling anyone about helping her, he was escaping them. While she felt he probably felt a little sorry for earlier, she now realized that the whole day had been about another woman, and somehow that made her very uncomfortable.

"I…I am glad you feel comfortable here. I regret, then, that I need to ask you to leave."

Shikamaru looked at her, completely confused. Hadn't they just been talking? Had he not just complemented Sakura? "But our game isn't finished."

"You were going to win, even if you were trying to draw it out." She got up and carried the tray of empty food dishes back to the kitchen. She disappeared, leaving Shikamaru feeling bewildered.

See, you weren't keeping the distance. That is why you feel confused, that is why this feels bad.

She came back with his clothes which were still not dry.

"I'm going into the kitchen to clean up, you can change. I won't look." She thrust the damp clothes into his arms. She also went to the fire and poured a bucket of water onto the embers. Suddenly, to Shikamaru, the room felt cold, and it wasn't just the lack of fire or damp clothes he was holding.

She left, and he changed, cringing as he pulled on the stiff, damp clothes. He folded Sasuke's pants and set them where he had been sitting.

He got up and, just to avoid talking to her again, let himself out. It was still raining. He walked to Chouji's, berating himself the whole way.

_You let your guard down_.

This is why you stay away—you can't understand women, they are too much trouble

_You don't do friendships, you don't do anything that might get you hurt. _

_She would have been too much effort._

_Too much effort? For what? What was he really afraid of losing?_

_Sheesh._

It had been a bad day.


End file.
